Another After 50 Lesson

Before 50, I seemed to be needing to just be on the move constantly. This could be literally or even in my head. Everything was racing. Now, things are calmer, even when I have the weight of the world on my shoulders with 1000 things to accomplish all at the same time. The world still goes on, and the sun still rises and sets. This simple concept has helped me listen better as well; yet, occasionally I miss something. When I do, it hits me and I can take time and think about what happened and go on. As Winston Churchill said "he who does not learn from the past is doomed to repeat it." I don't want to be in that category and probably won't because I tend to go to extremes in trying to figure out what happened.

In attempting to learn from the past with homeschooling, I asked both of my children what changes they would like to see in school as well as anything my husband or I may be able to change. They're teenagers, so I know upon asking this I am tempted to shrink in a corner ;) but I must stand tall. To my surprise, my oldest shocked me. (actually that, in itself should not be a surprise.) She usually would push me away when I went to see if she was on task with an assignment, etc. So when asked what she would like to be different this year, she immediately said "I want you to be more involved in what I'm doing." My initial reaction was to try to figure out who had abducted my daughter and given me a replacement that looks just like her on the outside. :)) That was ths absolute LAST response I would have expected, but I had a moment of pleasure as a mom, also. While I am working on granting her request, the all encompassing overwhelming feeling of being a mother of teens, working at home and homeschooling envelopes me. But it's a good thing, all of it. I want to look back and hope that God is speaking through my conscience and saying "well done."

However, I must look back and can't help but question....what did I miss? She seemed to push me away. Am I that out of it?? How can I avoid that from happening again?? Or, I may choose to attribute it to raging hormones (both hers and mine) and smile. I am after 50 now and respond to it differently. All of it.

How are you different now from your earlier youth, wherever you are at, in the way you respond and think of your circumstances?

Wishing you the best today-
Denise

2 comments:

Clydia said...

Hey Denise! Great post! Found you at Welcome Wednesday. Following now...

threemangoseeds.blogspot.com

coronaryrn said...

Great Post...I am enjoying life much more after 50! The kids are grown, and I get to actually enjoy my grandkids! Hopping through…trying to get to all my Wednesday Blog Hops! Follow Back Please @ http://www.pargasjunkyard.wordpress.com and on facebook @ http://www.facebook.com/PargasJunkyard …Thanks!